03-23-2007, 03:58 AM
03-23-2007, 07:42 AM
I have seen this odd loyalty before. My grandmother's mother died when she was just a baby and her father remarried quite quickly. His new wife resented the fact that he had a tiny daughter and a son. By the time my grandmother was 2 years old the new step-mother had beaten her repeatedly and broken her arm as well as thrown her down a flight of stairs and broken her leg. She beat them both without mercy and her father was no help whatsoever. When her brother was 16 he ran away from home to escape the abuse and they were separated for a life-time. When my grandmother applied for Social Security she was denied because they said ''no such person existed.''--there was no birth certificate under her name and she was told she couldn't have been born in this country--her brother was finally tracked down and he came to help her straighten things out--which he did--and it came to light that my Grandmother was filing under her nick-name not even knowing her real name. That always makes me soo sad that my Grandmother lived her life and never even knew her real name :( --60 plus years had gone by since she had seen her brother and they parted in anger shortly after being reunited over a discussion regarding the evil step-mother who had beaten them both and ruined their lives as my grandmother took Her side and defended Her--why? why would she do that? I don't know but my grandmother was a very difficult woman who fought for the underdog which is usually a good thing but she also fought against those who loved her for those who would abuse her and her own children suffered deeply over their lives with her and then without for they all ended up orphaned even tho they had living parents. My own mother never lived with either of her parents again after the age of 5. My own mother has a story that rivals anything Charles Dickens could have come up with and my own mother and her siblings suffered awfully and their damage done to them is evident also. This kind of thing goes beyond simple forgiveness--it is a deep deep damage done to the victims that can ruin lives and then beyond as more children are introduced into the circle and the cycle that goes on and on until somehow it is broken--I know as it isn't that far from many of us-- :love:
03-23-2007, 09:31 AM
Thank you, Bangalore for keeping us updated on this most tragic story.
And, sister wolfie, thank you for the heart-rending personal story you have shared. That must have been painful to recount. This bizarre behavior, which seems to defy all logic, is actually a bona fide psychological phenomenon, known as "Stockholm Syndrome." I have written about that previously in the "Spiritual Catharsis" thread. And, since wolfie requested that I bring that thread up, anyway, that is exactly what I shall now do.
We all carry heavy baggage from life in this system. We are all in "Recovery." But we won't be fully recovered until the Millennium arrives.
isomam