"All men are created equal." So presumed Thomas Jefferson, third President of the United States and principal author of its Declaration of Independence. He also presumed "that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights." Those rights? Most of all, to enjoy "Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness."
But we know that was never true. Why? Because it was unlegislatable, its entire premise being, not the innate capacity of men to choose, but whether faith in God would make it possible to choose better. And should faith fail, or worse—should God fail, then freedom would also fail along with the ability to choose.
So while it may seem good in our hearts that all men should be equal, it is ingenuously altruistic to think by saying it is so that it becomes so. Moreover, because such freedom is restricted to a constitution inseparable from faith to a belief—the faith and belief of which not all necessarily share, it is therefore circumstantial to choices that are not ours to make, the "self-evident" claim of which was only made in rebuttal to the "Divine Right of Kings."
Thus, power is the only author of choice. And if we are not in possession of power, what choices do we really have?
This is such a story—told in duress of how limited our choices are—especially when discovered in a world deliberately flawed to appear gratuitous freedom so that all "self-evident" choice should not be seen in the hands of the kings who govern choice. This is the story of the little people, the ignoble and the misunderstood of humanity who bear the brunt of choices they do not have because the power to make them has taken away. It is the story of courage. It is the story of how the choices given can only be exceeded by the courage to survive and the willingness to learn better reasons to live. It is a story that speaks to us all.
But it speaks not in fiction or partial truth, for no greater lie has ever been than a truth half told, just as there is nothing more dishonest than truth told dishonestly. So is any journey of innocence taken into valleys of the macabre where truth need only be as truthful as it is made to appear, and justice need only satisfy that which is legally binding, so that fear is all that remains in this ever-changing and conniving world.
It was Mark Twain who said that “courage is not the absence of fear but its master.†What he really meant was that courage is not found until one wanders into the wilderness of fear in search of the fine steed of truth. But before the steed can be ridden through the valley of death shadowed by hate, secrecy and all its perpetrators of fear, it must be disciplined to face the most vile of criminal minds.
Contained better than any mausoleum, the greatest fear of all dwells in the vaults of family secrets built deeper than the very chambers of death, which is why the secrets families hold dearest are even more impenetrable than the grave. For a story to expose them all, innocence must search that which survives all—the human spirit. And we who want the story told need to search that which resides in the tender heart of our heroine, Claire.
Fatherless until age of five, Claire’s mother, grandmother and a catholic God were the only fabric holding her world together. A peaceful, happy world it was, until there came every mother’s nightmare—a stepfather named Willard.
Shadows of an Eagle is thus a journey of the heart, but not just any heart. It is a heart that must find purpose beyond truth and justice as well as the courage to live with a reality most people are unwilling to know or believe. It is a story that cannot rest until that which searches through the heart and its many shadows discovers what lies within.
Just so that everyone knows, it is not my intent to solicit interest the novel, “Shadows of an Eagle†by posting the above synopsis. It was actually to get help.
While a synopsis is defined as a "sketchy summary of the main points," in the novel industry a synopsis is used to provide a brief summary of no more than one or two pages to outline a novel for presentation to an agent or publisher. It's kind of like a preview to a movie launched to a new audience.
In the real world the synopsis can take as much work as the book took to write. Having said that, and having already reviewed the publishing industry’s own dilemma of trying to forage through its thousands of submissions every month (everything from enquiries to full manuscripts), it's no easy task for an author to even get a synopsis read. Hence, a query letter usually precedes the synopsis and tells the publisher who you are and why your yet-to-be-read synopsis justifies reading the manuscript.
So if you have any comments (criticism equally welcome), you are invited to share either here or if you feel more comfortable, by PM’ing me. Please don’t be shy. I’ve already had lots of critique and my skin is pretty tough. Anything you say is appreciated.
Love,
sw
But it speaks not in fiction or partial truth, for no greater lie has ever been than a truth half told, just as there is nothing more dishonest than truth told dishonestly. So is any journey of innocence taken into valleys of the macabre where truth need only be as truthful as it is made to appear, and justice need only satisfy that which is legally binding, so that fear is all that remains in this ever-changing and conniving world.
It was Mark Twain who said that “courage is not the absence of fear but its master.†What he really meant was that courage is not found until one wanders into the wilderness of fear in search of the fine steed of truth. But before the steed can be ridden through the valley of death shadowed by hate, secrecy and all its perpetrators of fear, it must be disciplined to face the most vile of criminal minds.
Contained better than any mausoleum, the greatest fear of all dwells in the vaults of family secrets built deeper than the very chambers of death, which is why the secrets families hold dearest are even more impenetrable than the grave. For a story to expose them all, innocence must search that which survives all—the human spirit. And we who want the story told need to search that which resides in the tender heart of our heroine, Claire.
Fatherless until age of five, Claire’s mother, grandmother and a catholic God were the only fabric holding her world together. A peaceful, happy world it was, until there came every mother’s nightmare—a stepfather named Willard.
Shadows of an Eagle is thus a journey of the heart, but not just any heart. It is a heart that must find purpose beyond truth and justice as well as the courage to live with a reality most people are unwilling to know or believe. It is a story that cannot rest until that which searches through the heart and its many shadows discovers what lies within.
I think this second to last line could be 'world' rather than reality, if only to draw in the editor's feeling of something much bigger, and closer to home. Reality is a word you use to create a sense of separation. World is a word you use to bring in a feeling of self, because we are a part of the world.
Personally, what I read of Shadows while you had it on the board, I adored. And I think that this is a wonderful synopsis. A bit lengthy, perhaps, and a lot of beating about the bush, but in a way that feels important and builds the feeling of a great injustice about to be revealed.
But I'm glad to hear your delving into the publisher's world. My only advice as a fellow writer is not to become discouraged. It's hard for publishers to feel that they can trust a new writer. But you are a passionate writer, I see it in your words and in your flow.
Best of luck to you. :thumbsup:
I think this second to last line could be 'world' rather than reality, if only to draw in the editor's feeling of something much bigger, and closer to home. Reality is a word you use to create a sense of separation. World is a word you use to bring in a feeling of self, because we are a part of the world.
Well put draka! :thumbup: I can tell you've had experience in the media on both grass roots and professional levels. Your own writing bears this out.
A bit lengthy, perhaps, and a lot of beating about the bush, but in a way that feels important and builds the feeling of a great injustice about to be revealed.
You have a nice way of challenging excessive verbage. ;) Not to worry. It's not the first time my proclivity toward wordiness has risked draining interest through repetitive thought. Sometimes we authors get so wrapped up in making a point, we actually dull it by oversharpening. Somewhat self-defeating, eh what?
Next?:tomatoed:
Thank you everyone for your critique and helping me to finalize this Synopsis of “Shadows of an Eagle.†Here goes:
"All men are created equal." So said Thomas Jefferson, third President of the United States and principal author of its Declaration of Independence. In summary he also presumed that all men are “endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights," those rights being the choice to enjoy "Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness."
But we all know it was never true. Nor could it ever be. While it seems good that our hearts should say all are created equal, it is ingenuously altruistic to believe that equality is possible just because it is so stated. Moreover, just because rights and freedoms are constitutionally tied to a belief inseparable from its guarantee, such equality is only circumstantial, or vaguely "self-evident" by political necessity—a rebuttal to the "Divine Right of Kings" never quite defeated—all of which leads the honest man to suspect that such freedom was never really given to us.
For such equality to exist it must go beyond the innate capacity to choose. It must address the power to choose. And if faith in “our Creator†makes it possible to choose better, should faith fail, or worse—should the Creator fail—then such freedom would also fail along with its choice. Thus, power is the true author of choice, and if we are not in possession of that power, what choice do we really have?
There is a saying that “no greater lie has ever been than a truth half told.†Put another way, there is nothing more dishonest than a truth told dishonestly. So is faith when it is surreptitiously given and taken away, leaving the gullible lost in a crevasse where truth need only be as truthful as it is made to appear, and justice sufficient only to satisfy that which is constitutionally binding in a fearfully, ever-changing and deceitful world.
Such is our story. In the raw existence of a world purposely flawed by the illusion that choice exists, it is a story told by the insignificant, the ignoble and the misunderstood who never had a choice because their power to choose never really existed. It is a story told when hope is gone and the inequality remaining can only be exceeded by the courage to seek greater reasons to live. It is a story that speaks to all.
When Mark Twain said that “courage is not the absence of fear but its master,†he meant that fear is not the enemy. Rather, fear is the fine steed of truth that must be found, trained and ridden through a wilderness where every lying beast awaits to consume the unwary.
And where does this wilderness exist? In graveyards haunted by ghostly shadows of the unseen? In dimly lit, trash-laden streets infested by strange and aimless wanderers who lie in wait to corrupt the innocent? No, it is the naked truth carefully concealed in vaults protected by the intelligent and powerful, an enigma of impenetrable silence withheld from entire generations by those who would defend it to the death—the family secret.
So here is where our story begins—in the very tender heart of a little girl named Claire. Fatherless until age five, Claire’s mother, grandmother and the hope given by a Catholic God were the only fabric holding her happy, peaceful world together until it was penetrated by every mother’s unspoken nightmare—a stepfather named Willard.
Shadows of an Eagle is not for the faint of heart. Nor is it a story that every mother wants to hear. It is a journey that exposes the stark truth of a world hidden from innocence. It is a story that surpasses all hope and the choices taken from our heroine, forcing her into wilderness lands where truth and justice no longer exist—a world that we would all prefer not to know. It is a story that cannot rest until that which resides deep within—the human spirit—finds its final resting place beyond all shadows of fear.
sw