The Top Five Groucho Marx's One Liners.
Send two dozen roses to Room 424 and put 'Emily, I love you' on the back of the bill.
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does.
Dig trenches? With our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy them ready made.
A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five Groucho Marx's One Liners.
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing..if you can fake that, you've got it made.
I worked myself up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
Remember men you are fighting for the ladies honor, which is probably more than she ever did.
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
How do you feel about women's rights ? I like either side of them.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
You have the capacity to learn from your mistakes. You will learn a lot today.
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
Always try to be modest. And be damn proud of it!
If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
I couldn't care less about apathy.
Energizer Bunny Arrested! Charged with battery.
I tried to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.
I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.
I used to be schizophrenic, but we're all right now.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
Bigamy: one wife too many.Monogamy: same thing
As I said before, I never repeat myself. As long as I can remember, I've had amnesia.
A seminar on Time Travel will be held two weeks ago.
Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
Hell hath no fury like the lawyer of a woman scorned.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
If a thing is worth doing, it would have been done already.
Why do bankruptcy lawyers expect to be paid?
Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.
There's no future in time travel.
Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
I have friends who swear they dream in color...It's just a pigment of their imagination.
Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Friction can be a drag sometimes.
He who places head in sand, will get kicked in the end!
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
Clones are people two.
A day without sunshine is like night.
Alzheimer's advantage: New friends every day.
Laughing stock -- cattle with a sense of humor?
Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
Police Station toilet stolen....Cops have nothing to go on.
Schizophrenia beats being alone.
A thing not worth doing isn't worth doing well.
Hard work never killed anyone, but why chance it?
All true wisdom is found on T-shirts.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
I want patience... AND I WANT IT NOW!!!!
The sooner you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up.
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
Borrow money from pessimists- they don't expect it back.
I'd kill for a Nobel Peace prize.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
Sometimes too much to drink isn't enough.
It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
Don't get married. Find a woman you hate and buy her a house. It's a lot easier on you.
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
When blondes have more fun do they know it?
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
Bureaucrats cut red tape, lengthwise.
I bet you I could stop gambling.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
All generalizations are false, including this one.
I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.
Polynesia -- memory loss in parrots.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
Is reading in the bathroom considered multi-tasking?
Seen it all. Done it all. Can't remember most of it.
Attempt to get a new car for your spouse - it'll be a great trade!
A good pun is its own reword.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore
The Top Five One Liners.
Did ya hear? They took the word gullible out of the dictionary!
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
For sale: parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
Warm Christian Love
Bangalore